“My biggest problem is what to do about all the things I can’t do anything about” ~Ashleigh Brilliant
We get to the GI department to see the same doctor we have seen for a dozen years. This is where we talk about any gastric reflux, food intake, nutrition, pooping, etc.
A young lady comes to get us, and yes, you know what’s next (well, you do if you read this blog and pay attention!).
How do you weigh her at home?
With a fish scale. How will you weigh her?
We can’t.
What you need to understand is that this is the GI clinic in one of the top hospitals in the country. In addition, it is the nutrition clinic. AND, in addition, it houses a major program that other hospitals are copying, a “Proper Weight for Life” program! And they have no way to weigh my 84 pound (38kg) daughter!
The appointment goes fine, a new nurse practitioner is sitting in, very quiet. The doctor finds nothing that should be causing Pearlsky her current issues. Then, out of the blue …
Does she have her period?
This is a GI doctor.
Yes, for the last 8 or 9 years.
Do you have a problem with that?
Both the doctor and the nurse practitioner look at me. Lots of answers fly through my head.
- “No, let’s Ashleyize her”
- “Sure, the cramps don’t hurt me a bit”
- “What a stupid ass question”
- “Huh?”
- “No better or worse than I have for the last eight years”
All I said was …
And the choice is … ?
There was no response, he just went on.
Then, at the end of the appointment,
Good to see you again. Please make an appointment to see me again in a year.
Will they let me make an appointment for a year out?
No.
Man oh man…there sure are some prize catches out there…however, doesn’t that question make you think they were trying to feel you out to see if you would want to have her get a hysterectomy? You know, to make it “easier” for her (and maybe you)? But they didn’t want to offer it up because, technically, it’s likely illegal…unless the uterus is diseased…and they might find an argument for that, since Pearlsky is having problems. Very suspicious.
That is just insane. I am frankly surprised that you didn’t lose it right then and there. I mean…HUH!?!
I think Claire’s stated it clearly.
So the doctor has no ideas about how, where to keep looking for the sources? Is he apathetic, at a loss?
I have not been on a scale in 30+ years. I have been in and out of multiple prestigious teaching hospitals. None have a scale that can weigh my paralyzed body. Actually some hospitals have scales and I have been on them. All were broken.
Your title is perfect (for me to understand this time).
Your response to the question was remarkable and perfect since it clearly put the ball back into their court. Their zero response was notable for not being any of the most egregious suggestions. If, in fact, they were not even in the realm of treating her normal cycle – inquiring just to suggest it as a possible cause of her distress – that might account for the ‘no response’.
Scales for persons who use a wheelchair full-time are downright common on rehab units. I mean, they exist. Looks like they just trust your report of her weight.
I’ll try this again. I am not a spammer. I simply find the internet intrusive at times, and don’t like to leave my email address hither and yon.
I think you are not being well served by your physician. Barbara is right about the scales for wheelchaired patients. Claire makes a profound point about the hysterectomy business–I think she hit the nail on the head, there. Hysterectomy is often offered as the first choice instead of what it should be–a last resort.
Are you in a position to doctor shop? Surely there’s got to be a physician who will serve you better than this–I mean, if that is what you are going to get, why even bother?
Oh, boy. Just keep stating it like it is. I do believe that’s all we can do.
I don’t really understand why your GI doctor concerns himself with Pearlsky’s reproductive organs. I thought his department was the digestive system and Pearlsky’s ovaries hardly qualify as such. I’m with Barbara: your response was perfect.
I just had to return and chime in on Erika’s statement. At least one thing is universal, when women have problems, doctors start with the woman’s issue thing. Last year when I had GI issues, every single doc I encountered went there first.
just to be fair, the doc may have simply been referring to the depo injection. once every three months and no period or cramps. a lot of my clients get it. as a matter of fact, i get it. it’s actually pretty sweet.