05 Sep 2009
“He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.” ~Friedrich Nietzsche
It’s a three day weekend and my friends are all out of town or otherwise occupied. It’s me and her, “she who must be obeyed,” my daughter.
Good time to sit back and contemplate:
- So, God, why did you mess up my kids so bad?
- Is this a cosmic joke, no god, just fate, just some cosmic ray attacking my gonads one day in my sleep?
- Why are they the first in medical literature diagnosed with such so there is no known track record, what will happen next?
- Why can’t they communicate at all. No way. Her math skills would be put to shame by Clever Hans the horse. Her English skills are greatly surpassed by Alex the parrot. And she does not come close to the communication of Washoe the signing chimp. Ummm, why?
- My daughter has never told me (if) she loves me. She has never given me a kiss. She has never said “thanks.” And, probably never will. Not that I need a “thanks” but a purposeful smile would work for me. Why?
- How am I supposed to wake up every morning and look forward to the day when I have no clue what will happen? Usually it is about 60% doable, 37% tough, and 3% sheer terror.
- Is it worth it?
I can answer the last one. That should count for something.
sigh…what a beautiful picture.
It IS beautiful. I’m staring and staring at it, just staring at it.
Who knows the answers to your questions? I do know that you make me laugh with your disdain for nutritionists and social workers (from the former post) and your descriptions of the animals that can “do” more than your daughter remind me of my own tortured thoughts (how a dog can fetch a frisbee, etc.) — don’t know why I’m saying these things other than to tell you that I feel a sense of camaraderie, and perhaps that’s worth something.
What a smile and let that be enough.
How beautiful! On her face you can see the love she feels for you and the security of knowing that you love her. What a wonderful image.
I accidentally found your website. But it was the best accident of my day. What a beautiful image, I think that image and that expresion of joy can answer all of your questions. Amazing.
Her smile just made my day brighter. 🙂
I love this picture…it’s so beautiful! I love her smile!
She looks full of love and joy. Great picture.
That is an amazing smile, I think she just might be a little happy there.
reading this in 2012, it inspires me to be a better man.