“Elevate me” ~Frederick Frankenstein – “Now? Right here?” ~Inga
It blows my mind that I couldn’t even make this stuff up. Out of the blue, a woman named Regina calls today. She introdroduces herself as someone in patient relations at our big city children’s hospital.
I understand from Wendy the nutritionist that you have an issue with there not being a method to weigh your daughter in the CCS clinic. They are moving to a larger space and will probably have a lift in the weighing room.
Well, actually that does not solve the bigger problem. Do you realize that not a single cliniic in the hospital has a lift? That your hospital cannot weigh my daughter and actually your doctors cannot perform proper exams because we cannot get her out of her chair.
I then ask if anyonne has complained about this and she assured me I was the first. I went on to explain how I do not pick up my daughter anymore and the doctors do not, so she is never properly examined. She had nothing to say, it was amazing. (yes, I often end up picking her up and then spend four days on diclofenac).
Don’t you think it is a farce that a hospital like yours does not have a single lift?
She then went back to the weighing issue. She said that one clinic does have a device to weigh the child and the chair. I asked her if she knew how much the chair weighed because I sure didn’t. More silence.
At the end, she sheepishly said she would get back to me. I politely asked if she was glad she called. She did not answer.
Makes you want to pick up the phone and call me, no?
OK, I am stumped as to why she did not ask you if it would be alright to have two nurses/staffers perform a two-person transfer and place your daughter safely and comfortably on an exam table while the chair is weighed minus all bags and cup holders 😉 This reminds me of the story of the truck getting stuck in the tunnel and a little girl finally suggests letting the air out of the tires to get it on its way.
But then there are probably no staff members trained in performing a two-person transfer anyway.
Can I have my calls forwarded to you?
And after you are done with the Keeper’s phone calls, could you talk to APRIA for me and ask them to stop billing us for a service that we had never signed up for, never received, and asked to be stopped about 5 or 6 times? Maybe it could be your third business – mediation when dealing with organizations with special challenges.
Sadly, most medical clinics…including hospitals…do not have lifts. Most people don’t know how to do two person lifts (though it certainly is not brain surgery!). The next trick is this….when they do end up getting a lift, no one will know how to use it, or they won’t be able to find it when they need it. God’ s honest truth!
She ought to be grateful for your comments. But unless she’s truly exceptional, she won’t be.
I haven’t mentioned yet that my nephew has spina bifida with no cognitive delays, but is paraplegic. My sister tells me stories like this one and somehow they never cease to amaze me. She’s known as a difficult parent who complains a lot but I think she’s awesome. You two could start that business Erika suggests.
I have a reverse story about APRIA in response to Erika’s. Baby Man had RSV at one month old, and we had to have a hospital-grade pulse oximeter at home before he could leave the hospital, and he was supposed to have it on at all times. We ended up staying another night in the hospital because the rep never showed up the day it was ordered. The rep who showed up had no idea how to use it with an infant and had no attachments for an infant–no one told her she was bringing it for a baby–the parent with a kid in the next bed showed us how to use it and the nurse gave us one of the hospital’s attachments. When we were done with it, we called to return it, and the company had no record of ever having given it to us. We had to call 3 times to finally get them to pick it up. I pointed out we could have just kept the thing, and the rep picking it up could only say, “Um, thanks.” Neither we nor our insurance ever got billed for the thing. Now I wonder who did….probably Erika. Sorry about that.
Just taking my chances again for commenting. Not having your phone number.
Chances are personnel in the PT dept know how to teach, guide and participate in a two-person lift. Good chances, I’d wager.
Barbara: Yes, they probably do, but alas, it is not my responsibility to organize the effort.
Beruriah: Maybe you do have a connection with Erika! Funny …
Claire: Sad but true.
Have had this problem too. I organize the effort since I want the examination to be thorough and it can’t be done as well in a chair. Also feel it is important for to be weighed when that becomes an element in care and monitoring. I am not about to put out my back when it is their responsibility to get this done, but I will provide the warning beforehand so that they can do their jobs
My mother has become increasingly disabled over the past few years and I find it shocking how little I knew about disabilities. I’m a nurse but I had no idea how hard it is for people to get around and live their life while disabled. I often complain and occasionally get some kind of action.
I love your rapier-sharp wit and the way you respond with cool logic with these phone monkeys when I go right to death threats.
Recently, a telemarketer called me but he wouldn’t admit that he was a telemarketer because we are on the “Do Not Call” list. He insisted that he had a wonderful free gift for me if I would just enroll in a free plan of some kind that I could cancel at any time without a penalty.
I didn’t like his vagueness about whatever crappy product he was pushing and so I snarkiy told him that ALL gifts were free and the phrase “free gift” is redundant.
He paused. I could feel the rage vibes wafting over the ethernet. Then he said, and I kid you not, “Why are you afraid to hear what I have to say?”
What kind of psycho lying ass telemarketer accuses a potential customer of being afraid?
I told him I am a trial attorney (true) and I am not afraid of him or anyone; I said I was annoyed at being pestered during my precious free time by some arrogant dork with a shuck and jive effort to rip me off. Then I told him to never call here again and hung up.
Your way is better but man, I hate telemarketers. If they had any integrity they’d become pimps or circus geeks.
I work in an aged care facility in Australia. I did work experience at a hospital for a time. Looking back, I can’t believe they didn’t have something as simple as a weigh-chair (I am sure that is a technical term) like we have at work.
While I was there, they hospital needed to weigh a frail old woman, who walked with a frame, couldn’t stand alone. They stood her on a regular set of scales, holding her hands for balance. Then they had to let go of her (*) long enough to get an accurate reading.
*This image turns my stomach, now. I now know how insanely fragile her skin and body in general would have been, how easy it would have been for the nurse to grab her arm too hard as she lost her balance, and either tear the skin, or cause Massive bruising.`