“Freud: If it’s not one thing, it’s your mother.” ~Robin Williams
I needed a quote on psychology … the title has minimal to do with the post.
I was asked / invited to write a post for the online version of Psychology Today, and it went up today! You can read it here. I want to thank Dr. Jennifer Baker for the opportunity! She hosts the blog over there called “For the Love of Wisdom – The logic of iambic half-lines.”
This post is for those new readers who come from the link over there, my regulars, well, sorry but this will be boring. But do feel free to leave a comment on the article if you like.
My “name” is Single Dad, I am in my early 50’s and am the single parent to Pearlsky, my almost 20 year-old daughter. I am her primary care taker, we live together and she is still in the public school district. She is severely disabled, non-mobile, non-verbal, totally dependent, and loved incredibly. My son, David, is in a residential facility. Both have the same genetic disorder, first identified in them (the gene was identified with Pearlsky and my DNA). This blog is our story. Our life, focused around her.
Why am I anonymous? So I can say things. Things that only parents in our situation can understand. As I say in this post, I want to be anonymous because those who love us would not understand when I say that there have been times when I thought “if she does not make it out of the ICU this time, maybe that’s a good thing.”
Feel free to start at the first post and follow the “More Recent Post” link on each page to get the whole thing, or just read some random posts that I happen to like, such as this, or this, or this, or this, or this or this.
Welcome. Leave comments, and check out the links on the sidebar.
Congrats on getting that out. Should stir up some…umm…stuff!
It’s a lovely picture there.
there is also a good article below yours from the opposite perspective
Bravo! You are amazing.
I will read it , glad to have you back, rock on SD rock on !
Brilliant — but I think I told you that already. 🙂
I’m a long-time reader making my first comment (I think). I spent a lot of time perusing your blog when I was pregnant with a severely disabled child of my own. Though I can’t understand everything you say (I am not the parent of a disabled child), some things hit home for me- most notably your tag line “If I were weaker…” . The first post I really read in depth, you were writing about people’s reaction to you caring for your grown woman of a daughter. I remeber thinking “This man is a fantastic father, people need to back the bleep off”. Now that I read this article, I realize you’re just a fantastic person. Your daughter has been dealt a shit hand, but you’re her pocket ace. You’re care for others in her situation is genuinely awesome. If there is anything after this life, I hope you and your children are justly rewarded.
I love the picture of you and Pearlsky in the article! 🙂
Wonderful, articulate, beautifully stated!
I was relieved to read the last part about Pearlsky’s menstrual dilemma because I have been wrestling with the same thing for 10 years now. Carrie is 23 and her seizures go off the Richter Scale during ovulation and menses. In addition to that, she gets obsessed with her “bloody bottom” every month and wants to share this info with everyone she meets. I tried the Depo Provera shot – it helped a little with the seizures but made her miserable and aggressive. I am going to try a low dose contraceptive pill, but if the seizures keep worsening, as they have for the last 4 years, I will have to consider an elective hysterectomy. Life’s a bitch. You SO rock, SD.
Very well written and compelling article, from a parent who is certainly qualified to have an opinion. I had read http://www.ashleytreatment.info before, but I don’t think I connected it to you at the time. I still can’t believe some of the comments on that site.
I kept it a secret for a while that it was mine. Yes, some of the comments are crazy.
I’ve been following this blog for at least a few months now. I started from the beginning and have read through everything. I just want to say that I can really have no idea what you are going through, but thank you for trying to explain some of it so that others have an inkling of the struggles that you face. Also, Pearlsky sounds like a remarkable woman. I wish more people had her attitude that you describe. Thanks, anyway, this is the first time I’ve commented here, but I figured it was about time I said something.
Yes SD you are her voice……judging from the photo she knows you are “the same” and she is not “the other” . Your young lady knows Your voice speak Her words. Beautiful article….congratulations.
By the way you know that fear you have about heaven….let it go. You will blessed by Her voice telling you how much she loves you, how she knows you are the best no nonsense all heart Dad!