“Let us not burthen our remembrance with a heaviness that’s gone.”
~William Shakespeare, The Tempest
Email sent today to gynecologist … I have known her since before Pearlsky was in utero … Pearlsky saw her once three years ago or so, no physical exam at that point … going in three days.
I was thinking about our appointment this Friday and cannot remember exactly the timing of the last appointment. There is something about Pearlsky you should know and I cannot talk about it in front of her.
There was an incident at school with her the summer of 2013 which is very difficult to discuss and I know that the mere references to it the first 6 months or so in front of Pearlsky upset her very much. As to her memory of it at this point, I have no idea. It involved her minimally, being touched (no evidence that she was actually penetrated), in or around her genitals, and more. It was fully reported, investigated, etc. (DDS, AG, and more). I tell you this because I am not sure how she will react to an internal exam. I actually have an excellent, incredible rapport with her (hard to understand that when you look at her, but we do), and I do not expect any issues when you examine her. Additionally, if in fact she has issues, either physical (as a male, I have no clue if these exams hurt, I know (or am told) they are “not fun”) or mental, I have many ways to deal with that easily.
Please do not hesitate to do whatever we need to do, there is no issue there. I just want you aware that she may not react as one would expect. I am generally very in tune to what she is experiencing and will let you know, I just may be a tad cryptic. She does get urinary catheters every so often (she is prone to UTI’s) and deals with that fairly well.
The incident itself is discussed in an interview if you are interested … I have a fairly well known internet/blog persona as you will see.
http://conversationlibrary.org/project/single-dad/ (third video)
I don’t think there will be any issue, and quite frankly, you are the only person I trust in this regard, I would not take her to anyone else.
If we are still you patients, we will see you Friday. 😉
You absolutely did the right thing by filling in the doc. Women with a abuse history do that when they go to the OBGYN. Thank you for being your daughters voice.
I can only imagine how awkward it must be to take your daughter to the OBGYN. You are a great Dad. You are doing whats best for her.