What’s with all the crap?
I get a call from school, Pearlsky seems upset. The aide thinks it may be stomach related but is not sure.
I go to school and check her out, and quite frankly, I am not sure. She is obviously uncomfortable and does seem every so often to be straining, hence maybe she is a bit constipated, something very unusual for her.
After she gets home, the nanny and I agree so I go to the pharmacy. I ask where they have the glycerine suppositories and then ask the pharmacist if she thinks Pearlsky would need the child or adult size. She hesitates when she starts to say “It depends on the size of …” and I complete her sentence looking her right in the eyes “her asshole?” She looks uncomfortable. “Compared to what?” I ask.
I get the children’s size figuring I can use a couple if I need to. I also pick up some prune juice. It is better not to try drugs first I figure.
Once home, I give her one of the suppositories (a trivial task in case you are wondering). I tell the nanny to give her some prune juice with her 5 o’clock meds and I go back to the office.
When I get home, I ask if she took the prune juice, not knowing if she would like it or not. The nanny proudly states, “Yes, actually she loved it and drank five cups!” Thinking she was kidding, I looked at the bottle. Yes, five.
Oh shit.
About three hours later I was doing lots of laundry, cleaning the walls, etc.
Now, with a show of hands, who is glad I am back to blogging?
Sounds like a fantastic start to a wonderful weekend ; ) Have you thought about giving your nanny a nice box of chocolate covered laxatives? Welcome home by the way!
What, you thought you could scare me off with a $hit story? Sorry, but you’ll have to try harder; those are common around here. 🙂
I for one am very glad that you’re back to blogging, and that Pearlsky is enjoying her new juice – even if it does yield messy results. Coincidentally enough, Monkey Boy asked just yesterday for me to check to see how you and Pearlsky are doing.
Good lord.
For some reason, when I type “good lord,” I am told that my comment is too short; hence I will continue filling up space, thrilled that you’re posting regularly again even if it’s a gross story that you’ve regaled us with —
And now I’ve ended a sentence with a preposition.
I am. For many reasons.
But for something pertaining to this post, I am just glad that others have days where they are literally, elbow deep in crap. Not glad as in glad you were elbow deep in crap, just glad to know I am not the only one who has days like these.
We have tried everything under the sun to help in this department and we have recently kicked the Miralax habit and fingers crossed, are having some luck with lactulose.
Welcome back SD.
5 cups!!! I do remember giving our toddler prunes, and OMG the smell of those nappies..
Does that nurse have a secret grudge against you? Because she effectively used the prune juice as a weapon!
It makes me think of Monty Python’s Always Look on the Bright Side of Life (from Life of Brian).
Life’s a piece of shit, when you look at it
Life’s a laugh and death’s a joke it’s true
You can see it’s all a show, keep ’em laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you, and…
Always look on the bright side of life
Always look on the bright side of life…
🙂
Hope your weekend ends on a cleaner note than it started!
Was eating tea as I read this, didn’t bother me and I’m glad your back 🙂
Oh dear..poor Pearl Sky, poor you..silly nanny!
Very glad you are back!
Oh shit, indeed!
I’m glad you’re back to clogging, BTW.
Oh shit, indeed!
I’m glad you’re back to clogging, BTW.
The comment robot doesn’t like my short comment so I will type more. I missed hearing how you and Pearlsky are doing. As for the pharmacist, her hesitation in saying exactly where the suppository was supposed to go reminded me of the hilarious funny “Don’t be Dirty” game show sketch on A Bit of Fry & Laurie.
Oh dear! Too funny! I can laugh “with” you since I’ve been there myself.
No, you can’t scare away your regular (no pun intended) readers with prune juice stories.