I ain’t no carny

No, I’m not a carny, but yep, I’m going to hell.

We went to the neurologist today. A really good guy, hints of geek like me, really knows his stuff, we like him.

We were talking about the last appointment where I told him that Pearlsky would go into a seizure whenever I used a specific kitchen gadget and that I could make the same noise. He wanted to see, I did it a bit, Pearlsky started to react, end of demo. It is called a “reflex” seizure. That was last year.

During this appointment I told him that she does not do it anymore and I went back to using the gadget. This was discovered when a guest used it and Pearlsky was in the room. He was impressed and a bit puzzled so I said “I’ll show you.”

Can you guess why I’m going to hell?

Yep, absolutely. Full on seizure. S-E-I-Z-U-R-E. I am soooo going to hell.

She came out of it within a minute and was fine. I came out of it about 30 minutes later. I assured the doctor that I don’t do it as a parlor trick.

At the end of the appointment I got a bit of a “talking to” about a different topic. See, the nurses go crazy if you need a prescription refill and don’t have an appointment to see the doctor. Obviously it’s in the record that, well, I am a first class offender. It is so bizarre, you call and say you need a refill. They say that you need to see the doctor and since you don’t even have an appointment, they will give you a one month refill once. So, you make an appointment, right? THEY GIVE YOU THE NEXT AVAILABLE AND IT’S FOUR MONTHS OUT! So, he tells me to make sure we get an appointment for next summer.

OK, cool. I go to the desk on the way out and ask for an appointment for one year.

Sorry, we can only schedule five months out.

I just look at the young lady.

You’re shitting me, no?

No, sorry.

Give me the latest appointment you can. Understand, when you call to remind me of it, I will cancel and once again get an appointment five months out.

That’s not fair to others.

Look at my daughter sweetheart. Define “fair.”

Austin Powers: Only two things scare me and one of them is nuclear war.
Basil Exposition: What’s the other?
Austin Powers: Excuse me?
Basil Exposition: What’s the other thing that scares you?
Austin Powers: Carnies. Circus folk. Nomads, you know. Smell like cabbage. Small hands.


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