What not to expect when you’re expecting
If you had a web site that was geared towards pregnant couples (yes, I know, it’s the woman who is pregnant) and couples with newborns, who is the last person in the world you would ask to write a guest post?
I am sitting around, minding my own business, and I get this email:
I just wanted to reach out and see if you would consider a possible partnership with What To Expect. There are several opportunities available and we’d love the chance to work with DisabledDaughter.com. Look forward to hearing from you!
Regards,
Partnership Director
WhatToExpect.com
Strangely enough I get emails like this, and usually they are for dumb things and obviously junk. This one caught my eye so I checked out the website and it is legitimate. But wtf? Me?
So I wrote back simply one sentence:
Are you familiar with my blog at all?
And the response:
Hi SD,
I am, and the editors are as well. I know that you blog about extremely sensitive, and harder subjects than most bloggers. We are trying to give a voice, and some insight into the challenges faced by parents of disabled or special needs children. Although it is hard, there are parents out there that are newly going through it. We feel you might help new parents with their journey. We thought some insight into the early years would be beneficial to any other parents beginning their lives as you once did. Please let me know if this is something you’d like to help with. Have an amazing day.
I failed them in that I decidedly did not have an amazing day that day, but I did realize that a) I want to drink their Kool-Aid, and b) they did know who I am. So I wrote something, they posted it today, and well, here we are.
I want to welcome any new readers that have come here from there. Note that the readership here is fairly skewed towards parents of the disabled, anything from the higher functioning end of the autism spectrum (and I am sure I got the new words wrong), to epilepsy, strokes, undiagnosed stuff, severely disabled, you name it. Some of the readers are disabled, I know of a couple with cerebral palsy and other issues. Then there are the social workers. And the therapists, some special education professionals, a couple of medical students, one or two sicko stalkers who just like me, one or two who really don’t. Oh, and Ken.
Feel free to read; start at the beginning to really understand. If you are here and you just recently received “the news” about your child, and you think the world is going to end (trust me, however much you want it to, damn world never ends) then look at what many of us want to say to you, right now, having been there.
Welcome. Leave comments. Visit the blogs on my blog roll.
Women, you will need to put on your big girl panties. 😉 Men, you need to find your empathy, compassion and strength. Get ready for a wild ride.
Note that the What To Expect website is educational and a great resource. But it is also a fun read. Heck, today I learned that sperm is a superfood, that some women actually do have orgasms while giving birth, and why my boobs are killing me.
As for the regular readers, I will do a great update in a day or two. I met the mouse. What a manly tail. And, those of you who wrote me about peripheral neuropathy, do so again. And yes, more on Pearlsky. There is always more on Pearlsky.
Thanks for the shout-out, Single Dad, of our video.
As for big girl “panties,” — well, I despise that word and will continue to wear the big girl underwear that I put on over eighteen years ago.
That project was your idea, and a great one. The printout of the book is really cool if anyone wants one, they can write to me. And I hope others link to your video.
As for the “panties” reference, I actually hesitated when I wrote it. I read it a couple of times, and could not think of a better phrase to use. I did not, and absolutely do not, want it to come across condescending, and put that dumb smiley thing there hoping to escape those comments.
Besides, there is something special about a woman in big girl underwear … but I digress …
You never cease to amaze, SD, you know that? Proud of you and all you do here and now over there.
I was honored to be part of Elizabeths project. It was certainly a step out, way ou,t of my comfort zone. As pictures of me are far and few between. But I felt convicted about lending a voice to the video. Our messages are too important not to be seen and heard.
I’d love a printout of the book. I will email you my address. Besides you’ll need it when you and Pearlsky drop by in your RV.
I noticed my link to my blog is incorrect so I came back to fix it. Might help if it is the correct one incase anyone wants to visit my crazy world of parenting Miss Z.
Nice article SD. Still hard to believe they asked you, so +1 to them for their courage to branch out. I especially liked the part about people you and Pearlsky have met due, at least in part, to her disability. We have also met many wonderful people we never would have if Zac was not disabled, including therapists, other parents and respite workers.
Also… “I failed them in that I decidedly did not have an amazing day that day” cracked me up. Just writing it here again does too 🙂
Happy to be one of the sicko stalkers who just happens to like you. (I am NOT a social worker, despite all the mail that is delivered to me with my name followed by the letters MSW. I really don’t know where that came from.)
LOL! Hmmm … Sicko Stalker, MSW … works for me.
That post at what to expect was the best. Heartfelt, thoughtful.
Hi SD. I linked to you from that AOL article, & spent the rest of the day here. I can’t find the words. Except, Well. Wow. Thank you. Wow.
Welcome! Thank you for the kind words.
Love the article, love your blog, love love LOVE the very sweet picture of the two of you at What to Expect. They were wise to reach out to you and are lucky to have you as a contributor.