“Do you still beat your wife?”
I was asked the following question by two investigators, one from the state’s adult protective services (Pearlsky is 20), and the other from one of our city’s police detectives. They both knew at the time of the question that I had resumed sending her to school. The actual conversations.
Do you feel she is now safe in the school program?
A question with no proper answer. The response to each was the same.
You know I sent her to school this morning. You are not a mandated reporter, you are who a mandated reporter reports to. If I tell you “no, I do not feel she is safe” I am saying to you that I knowingly and purposely put her in a situation in which I think she will be in danger. That would not be the best thing for me to admit to, would it?
A few weeks ago I felt that Pearlsky was “safe” in the school program. I put her on the bus every morning believing she would come home seven hours later in pretty much the same condition as I sent her.
After the steps and agreements put in place, I sent her to school this morning. Do I think she is safe? Yes.
Is that “safe” any different than the “safe” a few weeks ago? Does it have a whit more meaning? Or rather, isn’t my feeling she is safe as meaningless now as it was then?
What would make you feel that she is safer?
A rottweiler I personally train? A female trained assassin who believes Pearlsky is her daughter? The reality is, nothing would.
Maybe knowing the LHC will be turned up to 11 tomorrow.
I feel so terrible about what you and Pearlsky have gone and continue to go through. These updates are chilling to me in their spareness — your ability to cut through what must be intense emotion is formidable. I often think that these crises — this one and others that many of us are subject to — should be responded to with real gnashing of teeth and wailing and pulling out of hair. That we are “supposed” to answer questions and act rational, civilized, is just too much to bear.
I wish I had something helpful to say . . . 🙁
Oh SD I’d like to say how unimaginable this entire situation is; however honestly I’ve imagined and feared it every day since my girl began school 11years ago.
However weakly this may seem I’m still sending prayers and positive thoughts your way……
Send me along with her, then she’ll be safe. Anyone tries anything, I will rip off their arm and suffocate them with it…. because I care ^.^
Realistically, though, whenever someone sends their child out into the world, it is assumed they are being sent into the safest situation that it can be. However, it is never absolutely certain. No one is constantly safe, sadly.
Every time I start to type something, it just doesn’t seem right. So here goes. This situation is heart breaking but Pearlsky has you and you have Pearlsky. I wish there is something I could do to help, just know that I care.
Like everyone else, I wish I could say something, or help some way or do something. But I can’t. So I’ll add my support to the rest of the support you get from your faithful blog readers and hope that helps just a smidge.