Things I’ve learned …

  1. Wiping the blue stuff off an Aleve tablet with a wet paper towel makes it much easier to crush and dissolve.
  2. The only ones who think that not having a diagnosis is not a big deal are those who have a diagnosis.
  3. Having your daughter wear a t-shirt that says “Better f–ked up then a f–k up” is not considered funny by everyone.
  4. There are women who are not afraid to take on a single guy with a disabled daughter. Those are the good ones. The ones who ask if you like cats are the throw-aways.
  5. Trying to change your daughter when she is in the midst of a giggle and coughing fit and it is not the best time of the month can result in a hysterically funny and hysterically gross incident that you will never describe to anyone. Ever.
  6. No, you don’t understand. You can’t, you don’t and don’t even start to think you do.
  7. Pediasure doesn’t suck. Actually if you are running late and did not get your breakfast, it works. The vanilla and chocolate, beware of the strawberry. And the orange tastes just like Tegretol.
  8. Mendelian genetics and the theory of one in four pregnancies going south if both parents are carriers is bullshit.
  9. When I first learned of the Ferber Method, I thought Ferber was an idiot. When I met Dr. Ferber, I confirmed he was an idiot. When he re-wrote his book and changed his mind on his theories (somewhat), I still thought him to be an idiot.
  10. This man, however, has a reserved spot in heaven. Near the window.
  11. Social workers and school nurses are living proof that you can conceive during anal sex.
  12. When Dorothy said “There’s no place like home,” she was right. Home is unique to the core. I still don’t know why she wanted to go back.
  13. “You and your friends get together. Everyone puts their problems on the table. When you look at them all, you’ll take back your own.” ~ Pearl, and boy do I miss her.
  14. At best, medicine is an art and not a science.
  15. Mom was right when she taught me, starting at about age two, that “adore” is more than “love” and I would understand it when I had kids.
  16. Mom was right when she told me, at age 34, that it did not matter what the kid was like, “adore” is “adore.”
  17. If offered a magic pill that would instantly make my daughter “normal” I’d … hesitate, think about it, and probably give it to her. Maybe.
  18. People can and do “rise to the occasion.” And some do so beautifully (msdb …).
  19. God works in mysterious ways. Some of them suck.
  20. My kids have taught me how to love unconditionally, they have brought wonderful people into our lives, how to appreciate both the little and big things, that without perspective we have nothing, and that despite it all, life ain’t so bad when you have friends, love, hope and support. Oh, and let’s not forget blog friends.

(Have you noticed the Gallery is growing?)(Stand up for your kid!)

Your turn.

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